Why 50/50 is some "ish" that starts with a B.

Get ready for a groundbreaking perspective shift! It's time to break free from the stale old advice that tells us life and work must always be a 50/50 balancing act. Seriously, how long have we been fed this outdated mantra? It's way beyond time that we explore a more dynamic and fulfilling approach. We can't just run on caffeine, lack of sleep and prayers. We have to make tactical changes to achieve harmony.

Life is a rollercoaster, and we all know it. Some days, we're conquering the professional world, setting the pace, and making things happen. But let's be real; most days, we're juggling multiple priorities, desperately trying to keep everything from crashing down. So, how do we navigate this daily paradox? It's all about intentional time management.

Think of your life as a dazzling juggling act. In one hand, you've got the delicate glass balls: family, relationships, health, happiness, and mental wellbeing. In the other, you're tossing the resilient rubber balls—projects you can delay or those pesky 4 pm meetings when you're rushing to catch the bus.

Here's the secret: you must recognize which balls are glass and which are rubber. Because when you're juggling so many, some are bound to drop. The trick is knowing which ones can shatter and which ones will bounce back.

Time for a paradigm shift.

What if we rewrite the entire narrative? What if we embrace the concept of integration rather than relentless balance? In reality, this integration has been happening all along, but now we have the words to define it.

We're no longer settling for jobs that suffocate our lives; we're seeking careers that empower us to be present and fulfilled within our broader life context. Work is just one piece of our intricate puzzle.

A personal anecdote: I once interviewed for a competitive position, and the focus was solely on the job at hand. Rarely did anyone inquire about my family, passions, or life outside work. While work matters, this glaring omission signaled that this job wasn't the right fit for me. I tried to broach the topic timidly, but the panel couldn't provide an answer. Disappointed, I couldn't commit to a role where I'd constantly swim against the current. Afterward, the only female panel member praised my challenging question but admitted she lacked an answer. This highlighted the systemic inequities women face in the workplace, only scratching the surface of what could have awaited me.

This presented a significant career challenge, especially since my goal is to help individuals thrive as better humans and organizations flourish.

Equitable Homes

Let's clarify: we're not discussing mortgage rates here (though that's important too). We're talking about Brené Brown's take on the 80/20 rule. She bluntly dismisses the idea of a 50-50 split in the home, recognizing that someone often carries a heavier load, frequently mothers. We acknowledge that one size doesn't fit all, but effective communication is essential to achieving balance in the home.

I've got your 70 percent

Picture this: the night before a big party, I came home drained with a mountain of tasks. Admitting I was at only 30% allowed my partner to pick up the remaining 70% for the family. This prevented clashes and resentment, turning a potentially stressful evening into a harmonious one. It's a game-changing approach we've embraced in our marriage. Now, you might wonder, what if both partners are at 20%? That's when careful family planning and heightened compassion for each other come into play. On those days, you simply survive together, in sync.

Balance

Balance isn't about a 50/50 split; it's about fortifying your core—your unique core. Trust yourself; all the tools you need are within you, even if they're buried deep. Here's your action plan:

• Evaluate your plate.

• Embrace "no" as a complete sentence—it is!

• Say "yes" only to things that ignite a resounding "YES" in your body.

• Check and adjust your boundaries.

• Re-balance your plate according to your timelines and priorities.

Most importantly, trust yourself. It's time to break free from the old paradigm and thrive in this dynamic, integrated life. If this article makes you think deeper, check out Episode 15 to hear more.